Meat Process

Grow it in your back yard!

A group of researchers from the University of Maryland have demonstrated that we can culture our meat products from a single cell of the animal in demand. Goodbye barbeque ribs -- hello homegrown meat a la petrie:

One process involves growing animal muscle and fat cells on thin membranes stretched over large flat sheets and then removing the meatlike material and stacking it together to create a thicker "cut" of meat.

The other method would involve growing the cells on small three-dimensional beads that stretch as the temperature changes and harvesting them to make processed meat similar to nuggets or hamburgers.

MMmmm... nuggets. From a different article:

Growing meat without the animal would not only reduce the need for the animals -- which often are kept in less than ideal conditions -- but may also address a number of environmental ills blamed on meat production.
...
Once the cells have grown enough, they could be scraped off and packaged. If edible sheets or beads are used, all of it could be eaten.

Will they grow bones too? I mean, chicken wings just won't be the same. Would you like boneless, or... boneless? This isn't going to fly to well with some folks, as you might imagine. Everything else is modified, why not throw some random cells into a little dish and watch them grow!



TODAY'S SPECIALS

*Chicken n' Wild Rice Soup (Made with chicken grown right here in our kitchen since 2013!)

*Bovine-celled Mushroom & Onion Burger w/natural growth hormone additives

*Pre-Millenium Special! Red-Hot BBQ Chicken Wings (taken from full-grown, live chickens -- with real bones! A rare delicacy!)