Pool Guy

Maintenance/Pool Guy: So, Buyankasha, would you mind checking the chlorine, Ph, and Alkaline levels in the pool while I'm gone? It's really easy... will only take you five minutes... BUT, you've gotta do it real early. Don't wait -- I mean, just in case any of the levels are out of whack. I'll be putting fifty-thousand chlorine pucks in the thingamabobber, so it should stay good until I get back. Whaddya say, Wednesday at 7:30 -- I'll show you how to do it?

Sucker: That's fine... sounds easy enough. See ya then.

WEDNESDAY, 7:30 A.M.

*Sucker walks into office...

Sucker: *Speaking to office person... Have you seen Maintenance/Pool Guy? He's not in back -- I didn't see him.

Office Person: Did you see if his truck was here? Hang on, I'll call him... *rabble *rabble *chitter *chatter... He says he'll be back in a couple hours -- he'll call you when he gets here.

Sucker: Thanks.

*the sucker waits, gets some work done while waiting, and wonders why he agreed to do this.

*rrrriiinnnnnnnggggggg.... rrrrriiiinnngggg... *the phone rings

Sucker: Hello.

Maintenance/Pool Guy: Buyankasha! Hey, sorry about that, I had a problem at a different building... want to come down to the pool? This... this will just take a few minutes... really easy.

Sucker: Yep, be down in a minute.

... *enter the pool area...

Maintenance/Pool Guy: So... here it is... this case... just open this case and grab the tabs and the beakers... put this much water in the beaker, AND JUST ONE TAB, otherwise it won't read properly. Oh geeez, yep, that alkalinity is a bit high -- should be at 120 or lower... it's 160, so I'll put down 120. Don't worry, like I said, I put fifty-thousand chlorine pucks in those thingamabobbers... ahhhh, see!? The chlorine is well above ten... it should be fine.

Sucker: Okay then... is there such a thing as too much chlorine?

Maintenance/Pool Guy: Naw-- as long as it doesn't go shoot up to fifty *smiles *laughs* or something it'll be fine. If the chlorine runs out, be sure to go grab some more.

Oh, and do you mind if I show you how to vaccum out the pool?... there were two dead gophers in here yesterday after the storm. Ya know, just in case something like that happens? It will just take a minute.

Sucker: yeah, that's fine... *sigh

Maintenance/Pool Guy: Alright then, follow me. *walk into room that contains pool water pump* Alright, you're going to want to unscrew this cap... pull out the basket... get all the gunk off... release the air pressure.. stand there and wait.. turn it on, turn it back off, turn it back on, then you're good. Let's go outside.

*grabs hose off of wall, attaches it to the "nipple" of the pool, begins to demonstrate the vacumming process, gets a phone call, gives the hose to the sucker.

*the sucker proceeds with the rest of the pool while maintenance/pool guy jabbers away about someone on methamphetamine for twenty minutes.

*Maintenance/Pool Guy ends his call, gets the hose from the sucker, takes two short swipes of the pool bottom and says:

Yep, that's about it... all there is to it.

Sucker: Thanks.